Friday, September 16, 2005

The "Paying Money to Read a Column by Maureen Dowd is Like..." Contest.

OK, gentle readers, here's a contest for you: complete the following sentence:

"Paying money to read a column by Maureen Dowd is like ___"

For example: "Paying money to read a column by Maureen Dowd is like writing a check to your proctologist."

Submit your entries to the comments of this thread by 12:00am 21 September. The winner for the best comparative phrase will receive some TBD Dead Drifts swag. Good Luck!

Thursday, September 15, 2005

Mistress Maureen's Charging For It Now.

No more will the New York Times' covey of columnists bestow their wisdom on us e-slobs for free. You will be charged about 50 bucks per year for online enlightenment. Too bad - I find Tom Friedman a thoughtful read, but not for fifty skins. I'll wait for his books. They run about 20 dollars a piece, and word for word they're a better deal. And the royalties go to Tom. We can't expect the NYT to be socialist - well, when it comes to its own financial enterprise at least. Too bad they can't have an online auction for the columns, maybe something like - I would bid Friedman high, but I would get it back by being paid by the Times to read Herbert, Rich, and ... Fraulein Dowd (did I hear a horse whinnying in the distance?).

All proceeds will go to the Pinch Sulzberger Home for Editors Victimized by Plagarism Scandals.

...Fraulein Dowd! (....neighheyyyy!)

Monday, September 12, 2005

Katrina Blow-Out.

Fierce winds caused by Hurricane Katrina are now blowing in - Washington, DC, of course. FEMA head Michael Brown has "resigned", replaced by a veteran firefighter. Good move - time to focus on FEMA activities, not personalities. Louisiana Senator Mary Landrieu gave her state and local authorities a complete pass on their handling of the Katrina disaster, placing blame squarely on the White House for inadequately funding municipal mass transit. She's got a point: all of those extra buses could have been - just as wasted as the scores of waterlogged buses that are presently sitting in the New Orleans municipal bus yard. And that was the coherent part of the Landrieu's Ophelia-like monologue directed at Fox's Chris Wallace. You can watch it here, courtesy of Political Teen. Meanwhile, Barbara Bush does what she does best. If you don't know what you want to say, perhaps you shouldn't say anything, Bar.

My prescription for this irritating malady is to open your checkbook and write one out to the American Red Cross for Hurricane Relief. Your blood pressure will drop, and your mind will be cleared of those icky dismemberment thoughts.
Alligator Boogaloo.
Clarence "Gatemouth" Brown has died, a week after losing his home in Slidell, La. His great music spanned genres, including swing, blues, and zedeco. The man could pick. He was 80. RIP. (photo from the Gatemouth Brown website)