Some Warning Symptoms of McCain Derangement Syndrome.

Associative Cognitive Dissonance - patient rants incessantly that McCain's stand on the Bush tax cuts demonstrated lack of conservative beliefs, while ignoring or dismissing runaway spending by Establishment Republican Congress. Foams at mouth about McCain's betrayal of 1st Amendment while exhibiting memory lapse about GWB signing same legislation (GWB stated at signing, "I believe that this legislation, although far from perfect, will improve the current financing system for Federal campaigns").

Must find McCain's life and character completely deficient, leading to citing dubious sources regarding the Senator's military record. This symptom may indicate patient need to view another's behavior as unassailably good or irredeembly evil. This symptom can also indicate Rushannitingrahamoulterlevine Worship.

Cannot project future consequences of beliefs or actions. For example, patient finds that it is sufficient to merely insist that *all* illegal aliens must return to native lands immediately, yet cannot articulate realistic and actionable plan to do so, and refuses to admit that present situation is defacto amnesty.

Must adhere to a strict orthodoxy, very similar to patients with BDS. For example, cannot permit other conservatives to advocate environmental stewardship since this entire topic has been historically deemed a concern only of the neo-Luddite Left.